Then and Now

Even though I still don't have enough spare time to do spring cleaning (yet I have enough spare time to write about it), I managed to dig up this old relic from my childhood. When I was a kid, my sister and I used to play this all the time, although I highly suspect that we "made up" a lot of the rules back then.


Chinese Checkers tin


Chinese Checkers tin, close up detail

If you look at some of the images depicted on the board, this Chinese Checkers tin is about as Chinese as pizza. If you take a close look, you will find randomly scrawled characters that are supposed to look like Chinese words and stereotypical images of rickshaws and Chinese people that have almond-shaped slanty eyes, Fu-Manchu mustaches, and straw hats.

I wouldn't go all the way to refer to this as offensive, although it does make for some interesting discussion. As the global village gets progressively smaller, cultures become more and more diverse. Little things like these are reminders that it wasn't always like this.

If you look at some of the North American cultural values of the early- to mid-20th century, it's clear that they could get away with offending certain groups of people back in the day, partly because the WASP (White Anglo Saxon Protestant) was not the visible minority that it is now. Stereotypes ran rampant in every sector of pop culture, ranging from comic books to popular films to cartoons. Some of them could be argued as relatively harmless, although some will really hit a nerve.

Some WWII era cartoon shorts were notable for this. In 1942, Paramount released a World War II propoganda cartoon entitled You're a Sap, Mister Jap, which depicted Popeye fighting the Japanese. This piece does have historical significance as it does reflect the times, but this cartoon will not likely be seeing the light of day any time soon, unless it is part of a retrospective that would feature Warner Brothers cartoons depicting Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck fighting the Nazis.

Today, old Dick Tracy cartoons featuring Go-Go Gomez and Joe Jitsiu won't see the light of day. Controversy over the Warner Brothers character Speedy Gonzales led to his cartoons getting pulled by the Cartoon Network, despite the fact that he is still hugely popular with Latin American audiences. Disney goes to great lengths to supress anything that would make the stockholders see them as less than family friendly by editing out racist images from Fantasia and denying all existence of them.

And then there's the stuff that's being produced today. The popular television show 24 is controversial among Arab-American communities due to the depiction of Middle-Easterners as terrorists. Possibly in response to that, the recent episode depicts the protagonist Jack Bauer going into an Arab-American owned gun store and getting help from the two proprietors. I haven't quite decided if pandering to ethnic groups is more offensive than reflecting the current news headlines.

How will we see this in thirty or forty years? If our reaction to culturally insensitive material from the mid-50s is an indication, we might see it even worse. But then, who really knows? It could be because the speed that information travels causes controversy to be stirred much faster, so it could very well burn itself out and be forgotten long before then.

As it is, when somebody does something particularly silly and puts up anything like an ad or a movie that features a negative stereotype, the response is immediate. Back when Disney's Mulan hit the theatres, it was praised for cultural accuracy by various Chinese communities (heck, I like it too). And then McDonald's went off and did a stupid thing by having a cross-promotion with the film and doing a commercial where a young girl forces her family to eat their lunch sitting on the floor, ending with Ronald McDonald karate-chopping something in half. "Hi-ya! Did somebody say McDonald's?"

After doing some research, I found that there are a lot of people who posess the same Chinese Checkers board and are trying to sell it on eBay, promoting it as a 1950's relic. My sister got it new in the early 1980s. The high bids hover around $5. Collector's item indeed.

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Technology-art project #3

This the latest in my series of weird technology art projects. Having already done two cellphone faceplates and a computer case, I used a 256MB flash drive manufactured by Kingston.


Stage 1: Unpainted

For best results, use 1000 grit sandpaper to remove the pre-existing finish so the paint will get a stronger grip on the surface.


Stage 2: Initial orange coat

The first layer of colours should be done in coats. I ended up using Testors' Model Paint which adheres to plastic quite well. I masked off some of the areas, partly because I wanted the logo to show through, but mostly because the green LED would be obscured by the paint if I didn't.

As I used a brush, the strokes came through. This is why multiple coats are necessary. Again for best results, 1000 grit sandpaper was used to smooth out the brush strokes.


Stage 3: Stripes masked off, painted in black

To create the tiger stripes effect, I tore strips of masking tape and wrapped them around. I decided to tear them rather than cut as I wanted a more organic appearance. I used a vice grip to keep the painted surfaces undisturbed.


Stage 4: All colours applied

After the tape was removed, there was some spill outside the lines, but these were touched up.


Stage 5: Final stage, with 2 coats of clearcoat applied

Clearcoat is good for smoothing out most of the lines and the texture. I ended up using Tremclad spray clear coat, which isn't necessarily the best applicator for smaller jobs like this, as it's harder to control the spray. But as model paint isn't intended to be repeatedly handled, it's important to do as it'll save the colours for a long time.

Next project: Will probably do another cell phone case.

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Bad guys: 1, Vince: 0.

You'd think I'd learn after all these years to never park at the Scott Road Skytrain station, but like a girl who you really need to stop seeing, I continue to leave my vehicle for upwards of 4 hours at a time when I go off to do my Capoeira classes.

Long story short. The driver's side lock was jimmied, so it doesn't quite work the way it's supposed to anymore. They left the stereo behind because it was secured and the faceplate was not in the car, but they took the stereo mounting kit (!) and my garage door opener (!!).

So, let's recap my day. I blew a midterm and my car got broken into. Bad things happen in threes. It's a good thing there's only 27 minutes left in the day. Maybe I should go to bed early, but I think I'll wait it out and see what happens.

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To do list, March 8th, 2005.

• Summarize articles for in-class presentation for next week on incorporating graphics in technical writing
• Read chapters 1-2 and Appendix E of Mark My Words
• Revise second draft of empirical research draft
• Study for Wednesday midterm exam
• Prepare oral presentation on professional writing website
• Prepare portfolio and resume for two job applications for Thursday
• Tear out hair (oh, wait, I already did that)

Note that sleep isn't on the list.

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Unfortunately, shaving my head doesn't necessarily
make me play guitar like the guy on the left.

It has yet to be determined if I inherit male pattern baldness from my father's side (+) or my mother's side (-). Still, I made the conscious decision to go cueball on my own accord. It took a lot of effort and I actually needed a lot of assistance. I first attempted to do it all myself and managed to get rid of the bulk of it, but I missed a lot of spots. Once my mom was able to nail the stray tufts, from there it was going from 1/8ths of an inch down to the scalp.

My observations are as follows:

• Most people who already know me reacted in shock. Reactions ranged from stunned silence to "Oh. My. God." In response to one reaction, I said, "Didja hear that? I got a 'woah,'" to which the person I talked to said, "And there's a good chance you'll get a 'wow' by the end of the day."
• I'm having noticeably less stress since doing the cueball treatment. While I can partly attribute this to the fact that I have a lot fewer assignments due this week, I'm also noticing a constant cool breeze going through my hair (read: stubble) even in a heated room.
• Showers take just as long, as the time that would normally be spent shampooing is now spent putting the electric razor to my scalp.
• Bald people can have dandruff too (who woulda thought?).
• Wool toques and hoodies are a lot harder to put on and removing them is almost like ripping velcro apart.
• People will not always rub a bald person's head for good luck.

I never had really great hair to begin with, which was part of my motivation for removing it. That, and I'm suspecting that it was coming out due to stress (although that was possibly due to me tearing it out more than anything else). On top of that, I was way overdue for a haircut. Besides, when the electric razor costs $30 and a haircut starts at around $15, after a few buzzes at the razor, it's already paid for itself.

I promised myself years ago that if I was going to take after my late father and develop MPB, I would shave it. Nothing is more sad than men suffering from MPB in denial and doing the comb-over. That's worse than surgical techniques and hair-pieces.

My only beef is that what I'm saving in shampoo I'll end up spending on moisturizer for my scalp.

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That's Good / That's Bad: The Day in Review.

Still in the middle of crunch time at school, I've suspected that I've had attention deficit disorder (ADD) as I've had difficulty concentrating on school work. So, I go to the doctor, and he tells me I don't have ADD. That's good.

However, it's not so much that I don't have ADD (no test was administered, because my doctor "didn't have time"), but I don't have a doctor that doesn't dispense pills like candy (I think that's good). Therefore, he only dispenses prescriptions for Ritalin if a parent comes in with their kid and their kid isn't sitting still and destroying the office. According to him, I'm "functional." Therefore, no Ritalin for me. And, therefore, I find myself blogging, watching DVDs, and goofing off when I should be studying. That's bad.

But, being that I was in my doctor's office (and I didn't want him to think that I was just pill chasing), I decided to have a bunch of other things done while I was at it, so I got my tetatanus shot upgraded. Therefore, I don't have to worry if I happen to step on a rusty nail. That's good.

Three scars, left leg

Back in 1994, I underwent a surgical technique called Ilizarov surgery, which involves having crooked or deformed bones corrected by surgically breaking them (via cortiotomy) and then straightening them through a network of wires pins and screws (click the link to learn more). This process also involves pins that are drilled to the bone through the skin. Since the pins were removed, the bone reacted and not only healed up the hole, but generated scar tissue and excess bone growth. Excess bone growth manifests itself as lumps under the skin. If I'm wearing functionally tight fitting footwear like snowboard boots or rollerblades for more than six hours at a time, I will be left with blisters or abrasions over the pin sites. I asked my doctor if I can do anything about that (eg: surgeon goes in and sands them down or something like that), but my doctor says it'll likely come back and even worse than before. That's bad.

"Fell in Love with a Girl" by the White Stripes,
transcribed entirely with my right hand

One of my goals of the year is to become ambidextrous, so I've taken steps by doing the daily morning crossword with my right hand while I eat cereal with my left (I'm left handed). So far, the results are somewhat mixed. Today, I got bored in class, so I wrote out the lyrics to "Fell in Love with a Girl" by the White Stripes with my right hand. Surprisingly, it's actually legible. Barely. That's good.

While I was at the doctor's office, when asking about options about what to do about the excess bone growth in my legs, he pulled out a catalogue of braces, supports, and tapes from an athletic medicine company. I mentioned off hand that I wear a wrist brace (actually a wrist guard for inline skating) during my martial arts classes. I then go into the story about how I crunched my left wrist after messing up a backflip. He asks to examine at the wrist. I stress it in a certain way that isn't painful, but causes weird crunching sounds (the other wrist doesn't do that). I also explain that certain movements cause pain while others do not. He then goes on to say that it won't get better on its own and will need surgery to repair. It'll take at least six weeks to recover, plus rehabilitation. He issued me an appointment card to get my left wrist x-rayed. I need that hand to write and my right-handed penmanship is not that legible. That's bad.

I submitted my portfolio for a summer work experience session through my school program. I submitted lots of eye-catching colour images, which I think will help, because I already talked to the person doing hiring and she indicated that she'd be interested in seeing them. I think I have a really good shot at that position. That's good.

Unfortunately, the summer experience is spread out over the entire summer, which means booking time off to get my surgery done will be difficult. Plus, it'll make finding paying work during the summer pretty difficult too. That's bad.

The school week is finally over. That's good.

I barely have enough time to study and work at the same time. That's bad.

If I quit my job, I'll have more time to study. That'll be good.

If I quit my job, I'll be broke. That'll be bad.

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To Do List, February Week 4.

Monday: 5-minute oral presentation on short story, theoretical research progress report draft.

Tuesday: 3 hours volunteer work for Adbusters magazine, copy editing assignment.

Wednesday: Oral presentation on job readiness website

Thursday: Final version of theoretical research progress report, technical manual planning guide, doctor's appointment, submit portfolio for potential summer work experience with Anvil Press (rewrite cover letter, revise resume, compile portfolio).

Non-dated, but must be completed by end of week:

-Query letters for Electronic Arts, Rethink Advertising, and Blast Radius Communications
-Clean room
-Review transcriptions for articles for Fangoria magazine

After all of this, it'll be nothing short of a miracle if I have all of my hair. I have a large stack of DVDs that are still in the shrink wrap while my XBox is beginning to rust due to lack of use. Tack on the fact that my deadlines are all skewed to hell due to rotating strikes from the BCGEU, it looks like I'll be well-occupied for the next two or three weeks.

Two weeks ago, my mom bought a case of a drink called "Red Rave", which is purported to be some sort of energy drink. My mom bought it thinking that it was supposed to help with my exercises. I had to explain to her the REAL use of it and pointed out the fact that it has a significant amount of caffeine in it. She was going to return it to the place she bought it, but I already cracked open a can. I will most likely mow through the entire case over the next two weeks.

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Plug time! The latest issue of Fangoria magazine containing my article "Angels and Devils" hits stands today. For that, I got to hang out on the set of Blood Angels (formerly known as Thralls) and hang with the cast and crew to get a behind-the-scenes report. Pick it up if you can!

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On yet another Valentine's Day that will likely spent by myself, I was seriously considering going into a rant into my frustrations on the dating and relationships, but it'd just come across as really bitter and depressing. So, instead, I'm digging up a previous gem and posting it for your pleasure.

The Top Ten Worst Valentine's Day Gifts Ever (revised)
(originally written for the Valentine's Day issue of Over the Edge in Feb. 1996)

10: A candle lit dinner for two...at McDonald's
9: A box of dead flowers from that guy you just broke up with
8: Personalized jewelry. That has someone else's name scratched off it
7: Red and white balloons filled with tear gas
6: A red and white teddy bear that says "I want to f*** you in the ass" when you squeeze its tummy
5: A Valentine's Day card that reads, "You will be my Valentine! You will! EVEN IF IT KILLS YOU!"
4: St. Valentine's dead rotted remains
3: A box of chocolates which are really chocolate covered laxatives reshaped into little heart shapes
2: Sexy underwear from some guy you don't really know, but he's been following you everywhere and leaving weird messages on your answering machine
1: A pair of handcuffs

Happy Valentine's Day to all of those who are fortunate to be with someone that they truly care for.

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On sit-down with my cousin at Mount Seymour

Today was yet another reminder that I'm not nineteen anymore.

Lethargic, exhausted, feverish, and sicker than shit. This is after three days straight of taking my cousin with me, hitting the slopes of Mount Semour, taking martial arts classes, and working out at the gym (and going shopping too). There was a point in time when I could do all of those things without needing so much as a nap and a can of cola, but since I wanted to make sure my cousin Kate's visit was memorable, I made sure that every day there was something interesting to do. I shouldn't really complain too much, because I brought this on myself.

This was mostly due to the fact that three years ago, when she came to visit us, a lot of what we were doing was just hitting restaurants, staying at home, listening to music, and watching movies. Sure, Vancouver has the infamous no-fun zone reputation (killjoy citizens trying to get rid of the yearly fireworks festival and probably not shedding any tears for the loss of the Molson Indy), but can't you do those things just about anywhere? So, I made sure this time would be different. It's probably a good thing I decided not to take her clubbing on Saturday night.

I dunno what was the most memorable moment of Kate's last visit to Vancouver, although it was possibly when I drove her and my mom to Peace Arch Park and inadvertently gotten ourselves detained at the border. Post-9/11, those guys don't mess around. That was pretty embarassing.

A couple years ago, I made the promise that I would go visit her in Australia before I turn 30 (I got at least a couple of years to go). I'll make sure I plan how I spend my time well in advance so I can at least deal with the jet lag and weird food, not to mention whatever I'll be doing while I'm there.

One thing is for certain, though. I have got to start acting my age.

But why would I want to do a thing like that?

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Artist Steve Skroce (The Amazing Spider-Man, The Matrix storyboards, Doc Frankenstein) at the Vancouver Comicon

Several weeks prior, I decided to indulge in the ultimate geek gathering, the Comic Book Convention. Harkening images of sweaty young to middle aged males that don't get enough exercise, debating as to who would win in a fight between Namor the Sub-Mariner and Aquaman, and the endless line-ups of people who want autographed comics, I went anways.

Things have certainly changed in the past twelve years.

The first comic book convention I ever went to was back in 1993, when Canadian alternative press artist Dave Sim (Cerebus) was doing signings at the Heritage Hall. I remember reading the comics years previous. While the serialized adventures of a talking aadrvark never got mainstream attention along the level of X-Men or Batman, the book enjoyed a fairly lengthy run (300 issues) and even managed to have some cross-over appeal, with his character making guest appearances in issues if Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Spawn.

It was the guest appearance in Spawn #10 that attracted all the fans, as the line-up to get his autographs and sketches was looooooong. This was all for a book that would almost never crack the top 100 selling comic books on a month-to-month basis.

Flash forward to 2005, where Vancouver-based artist Steve Skroce is doing signings. I go in and there is no lineup whatsoever. Remembering to bring my copy of The Art of the Matrix and my entire collection of Gambit comic books, I walk up to Mr. Skroce's booth, where he isn't doing much. Not really sure of who he is (I saw a photo of him published in an issue of Wizard, but that was years ago), I introduce myself and we chat. I get him to do a sketch of Trinity inside the Matrix art book, and then he signs all my comics, thanking me for buying all of those books.

The fact that a mainstream artist that has worked on many high profile projects is not nearly as a big a draw as an independent small-press comic book artist and writer tells me that the comic book industry is not nearly as profitable as it once was.

Ideas on how to save the comic book industry have been proposed by the handful. Put comic books in more locations apart from comic book specialty shops. More diversity in genres apart from superheroes. Make the books cheaper. Make them more accessible to younger readers.

Archie and Betty and Veronica repeatedly tell the same stories over and over again, with very few changes in the status quo, yet their circulation numbers are in the millions. In Japan, manga titles are accessible to audiences of all age groups and demographics, while you can get the latest issue of whatever hot title from a local vending machine. The top selling mainstream comic book, The Astonishing X-Men, moves less than 100,000 copies per month, despite the fact that Marvel Comics owns 37% of the market share, while Archie has a 0.38% market share.

Compare this to 1991, where X-Men #1 moves 8 million copies.

Whatever the industry needs to do to right itself, it must be done fast, as comic book stores are becoming an increasing rarity, as are comic book publishers (Dreamwave Productions, the Toronto based studio that produced the TransFormers comics, is the most recent casualty). At this rate, it will only be a matter of time until the heroes of the four colour world will only be seen in a theatre near you. And if the recent spate of comic book films is any indication (ie: Elektra, Catwoman), it won't be long until it's only seen at the video store.

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"And I know there'll be no more tears in hea-- HEY! Get that camera out of my face!"

Only the second time I've played guitar for a crowd, I somehow still managed to suffer from performance anxiety and completely bungle the lyrics to "Be My Yoko Ono" by the Barenaked Ladies and "Fell In Love With a Girl" by the White Stripes. But, at least "Tears in Heaven" came out quite well (even got people waving cigarette lighters too). Although I must hand it to people who are performers. My mestre was getting extreme close-ups with his camera and I was starting to lose focus.

The night was a see-you-later party held for a member of my Capoeira class, Hiro (or, as he's known in the studio, Borracha), who's taking off to Japan. To commemorate the event, there was a talent show. The acts ranged from entertaining to hilariously bizarre.

Last time I played guitar for my Capoeira group, it was at a Christmas party. I completely bungled up the chords to "What Child Is This," immediately followed by a punk rock rendition of "White Christmas" (not that you could hear what I was singing). Any glory gotten from the act was completely wrecked when my classmate Fala Mansa borrowed my guitar and promptly played a note-perfect rendition of "What Child is This." Oh well, my fault for not practicing enough.

So, yeah, I had a good time, and luckily, I did practice a little more, so I didn't completely look bad in front of everyone. Well, at least I'm hoping.

Come back to us soon, Borracha.

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This really stinks of urban legend to me, but it's an amusing anecdote nonetheless.

News headline: Man peed way out of avalanche

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As I write this, BCGEU has resumed their rotating job action at local BC Campuses. I'm 100% sure that BCIT is under lockdown right now, but I'm not sure about the rest of the campuses because there hasn't been any notice about it on the BCGEU website, a news blurb in The Vancouver Sun indicated that ALL BCGEU-staffed campuses would be on strike, and the Douglas College website hasn't been updated yet.

However, if the person that maintains the labour news is actually on strike too, well, that'd explain a lot.

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Hey, everybody. My first article for Fangoria Magazine has finally been published! The article, "Alone Time," is a report from the set of the Vancouver-shot video game-to-film adaptation, Alone in the Dark, directed by Uwe Boll, starring Christian Slater, Tara Reid, and Stephen Dorff. The magazine is on the racks now. Be sure to purchase your own copy before they all sell out!

Also, to mark the occasion, I have also launched an additional blog, "The Work of a Person Who Writes Things," as someone pointed out the fact that "Person That Writes Things" is not completely grammatically correct. That blog will be used mostly to promote my writing projects as they are released.

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Last night was an interesting experience for me, having been invited to perform at an event called Brrrrrlesque at The Lick, an alternative club. Ya-Wen (aka Bala), a student of Capoeira Ache Brasil, invited me to help out with her act, "Testosterone for the Mind." Her act was a parody of self-help dating guides, using Capoeira as a metaphor for dating and relationships.

Of course, there was a stern lecture about ensuring the safety of the patrons (and threats towards turning me into a "punching booth" for $5 a shot if I accidentally hurt anyone), necessary given the fact that the roda that was set up was about 2/3rds the size of a standard Capoeira roda, which meant that I couldn't do the crazy moves (backflips, etc.).

The crowd was impressed, despite the fact I'm nowhere near the level of some of other students in the class. The moral of the story? It doesn't matter if you have no clue what you're doing...as long as it's something that the crowd doesn't know how to do and you have fun while doing it, the crowd will be pretty amused.

The other acts were ranged from titilating to downright bizarre. The highlight of the evening: two burlesque dancers clad in lingerie, one also wearing an American flag, the other distributing peace signs, getting into a fight to the tune of David Bowie's "I'm Afraid of Americans."

Photos of the evening to come!

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As I write this, I really should be in school right now, but there is rotating job action among the unionized support staff of various Lower Mainland campuses. Among the affected institutions: Douglas College, Kwantlen College, BCIT, and North West College. There is a strong possibility that this will result in next week Tuesday's classes being cancelled as well.

I cringe as the radio news reports that 10 cm of snow just fell on Seymour while my snowboard sits unused in the coner as I have a 10:00 meeting for a school project. I could go now, but I then realize that I still have homework assignments to do.

Mental note: save it until reading week in February.

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Walkin' 'round a winter wonderland.

Or NOT! As I write this, I have about an hour to get to Richmond for work, which typically takes about 30-something minutes. I am seriously contemplating taking in a snow day and heading up to Mount Seymour, as my snowboard sits in the corner, unused, idle, neglected, unloved.

And then I realize that my MasterCard bill is coming in the mail. Shower, shave, shampoo, dress, drive, depart, work, whine, whimper.

An extended middle finger to those who took in a snow day today and yesterday. Yesterday, I started my volunteer stint at Adbusters magazine and finished at 1:00PM, thinking I had sufficient time to get to my classes. Not realizing that buses move at a snail's pace, I end up being five minutes late.

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It has begun.

After spending the better part of a weekend of cleaning up my area to make it more presentable for guests during Christmas and New Year's, it has all been shoved aside as now it is time to buckle down and concentrate on school. As it is, I decided that last semester was not nearly stressful enough, juggling regular school assignments with a part time job and attempting to maintain some level of a personal life (which hasn't gone as well as I've been hoping).

So, this semester, I'm taking an additional 3 credit course (total number of credits: 16, vs. 13 last semester), plus my editors out of New York assigned me two films to cover, The Exorcism of Emily Rose and Underworld 2. That, and I decided that I had too much spare time, so I'm now volunteering three hours a week for Adbusters magazine. My part-time job starts again this weekend.

Now what the hell am I doing blogging? I got an assignment due tomorrow!

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Ache Brasil on stage

Okay, still hopped up on that can of Red Bull (R), so here's another photo from Ache Brasil's New Year's party while I got something else on my mind.

New Year's resolutions are something that are done up by many people. Or, at least as many people as those that actually make a point of NOT doing New Year's resolutions for the sake of avoiding disappointment (those people disappoint me). I can speculate on a lot of reasons, the main being that attempts at self-improvement are usually met with failure.

While others tend to give up on them because they are unrealistic, I tend to give up on mine because they're too broad and general. But, here's what I got in mind.

My brother-in-law and I had a discussion about action plans, the long-term goals I should be concentrating on and the steps I need to do in order to make them happen. Plus, I'm committing this to a semi-permanent medium that everyone will see, so I kinda have to follow these through.

1: Improve myself socially. Action plan: be more aware of the way I am perceived by others and work to change that; stand up for myself more often; take a lot less crap from people; learn to choose my battles much more carefully.

2: Improve myself culturally/intellectually. Action plan: set aside 15 minutes a day to read a book not related to school; indulge in less cultural junk food (video games, comic books, action movies); do something culturally/intellectually stimulating at least once a month (eg: go to museum, see a foreign film or a documentary).

3: Improve myself physically. Action plan: continue to exercise regularly and eat properly; bring along journal to keep track of progress of any gains; adjust exercise program at least once a month to avoid stagnation.

4: Improve myself professionally. Action plan: complete education; get out of the house and meet more people and network more often; practice and improve time management skills.

The main difference between these and traditional New Year's resolutions is that I at least know what I have to do in order to get these things done.

Okay, that can of Red Bull just wore off. G'night and Happy New Year, everybody.

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All too cool for the room and off-duty
L-R: Stephen Nace, Brad Dent, and Yours Truly.

As I write this, I am still hopped up on a can of Red Bull (R) that I quickly slammed down in order to survive the drive home from Ache Brasil's New Year's Party. I don't know if I'm gonna get any amount of sleep. That stuff don't mess around!

Having suffered through a series of very unfulfilling New Year's Eve parties (not that I don't appreciate the time spent with friends, it's just that spending year after year watching DVDs gets old after a while), I decided I was actually going to WORK at a New Year's Party. Kinda have to, considering how much money I ended up spending this month (there's a good chance that my credit card company actually upped my limit so I wouldn't max out my card this month).

I barely managed to tear myself away from the coat check booth long enough to get upstairs where the party was so I could be there for the actual countdown. But all in all, I had fun. Sure, it was work (I took photos of the other people I was working with...I won't bore you with those), but it was an excuse to get out of the house on New Year's for a change.

The worst New Year's Eve I've ever had...making the dumb-ass mistake of driving my friends around to find a bar so we could be there at the stroke of midnight. Before I know it, drinks are being piled in front of them, but obviously I can't join in (designated). I go up to the bartender and give him the universal "designated driver" gesture. The best he can come up with is a glass of water. Way to support the "designated driver" program!

As I'm driving them back to the house, one of them attempts to hug me from the back seat. I almost cause a car accident.

Best wishes for the New Year to all my friends, family, and readers.

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Having discovered a little store called Daiso in Aberdeen Centre in Richmond, this is the ultimate dollar store. Okay, so they charge $2 per item, but compare this to your average dollar store, you easily get much more than they offer. About two floors worth of merchandise contains just about everything imagineable, from housewares to clothing to skin care products. And then I found this.


If it doesn't do what it promises, do we get our money back?

My understanding of Japanese is minimal at best (I haven't quite gotten past baka gaijin), but it's safe to assume that this is hair gel (also based on the properly translated ingredients list). There are probably better hair styling products on the market, but it's something I didn't actually purchase for its original use (get your mind out of the gutter, you sicko! I collect odd stuff like this!).

This is an example of what's become known as Engrish, or English that has really been lost in translation from its original language, usually Japanese or Chinese (I have since submitted the photo to the Engrish.com and am waiting to see if they put it on the site or not).

As Canadians, we're all familiar with bilingual packaging. As a result, every Canadian knows the words for English/French translations for words such as "sans sucre" (sugar free), "gagner" (win), and "gratuit" (free). It's different when it comes to Asian/English writing, because you have instructions on a can of batter coated peanuts reading, "Refrigerate for better crunchy."

But, either way, I have discovered a place where I can easily maximize dollar limits when given the task of assembling a Kris Kringle gift on a budget. Although I can easily picture the shock of the hapless gift receiver as they open up the gift to discover a bottle of "Pocari Sweat" (that's supposed to be a refreshment beverage, by the way).

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I got a few nice presents from my family this year. Which one was my favourite? Let's just say that I didn't take a photo of it because I'd have to be standing in front of a mirror in order to do so.

I really think my sister is trying to tell me something, though. Last year, it was a copy of The Worst Case Scenario Survival Guide Handbook: Sex and Dating.

Christmas was fairly uneventful as Christmases tend to be...visited my father's cemetary site, had lunch, opened presents (I got my brother in law a Popeye t-shirt that says "Well Blowz Me"), helped prepare dinner, watched a couple DVDs (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, and the first two Die Hard movies, FYI).

Hope everyone had a great Christmas.

ADDENDUM (December 26th, 2004): Okay, okay. After thumbing through the book, it has some fairly useful advice on culture, fashion, and grooming. While there is the risk that some of it may become dated within the next few months (as fashion trends tend to do), the fundamentals are still the same.

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"What does not kill you makes you stronger."
-Self-motivational cliché

"What does not kill you often gets it right the second time."
-Self-motivational cliché reworked for realism

So, after people reading my last post will probably wonder...what DIDN'T suck this year?

Body and Mind. I'm probably the physically strongest that I've ever been. Barring any recurring injuries, I can do the things that I couldn't dream of doing years ago, whether it be acrobatic moves for Capoeira or bench pressing my own body weight, which has actually stayed consistent for the last ten or so years.

Young at Heart. People still consistently think I'm younger than all of my 27 years. This is despite the fact that little grey hairs are sprouting out of the sides of my head and when I run my hands through my hair, at least five hairs come out (none of which I are grey). Worst moment? Someone thought I was still in high school. People wanna know my secret. I'd tell you, but I'm still waiting on the patent office.

I Don't Wanna Work, I Just Wanna Bang on the Drum All Day. As much as it sucks to have the rug pulled out from under you, getting laid off from A&B Sound was probably one of the best opportunities as it allowed me to go back to school full time (plus, I didn't spend that much money while I was working).

School Daze. While my marks haven't all come in yet, so far I've gotten a B (Communications 1118: Workplace writing), a B+ (Interpersonal Skills), an A- (Fundamentals of Professional Writing), and an A (Markets and Job Applications). This, after about a 4-odd year absence from formal schooling, is really nice. The only bad thing about that...my "A" was only in a one credit course, while the others are worth three credits. D'oh!

Night Out With Friends: $20. Date with Member of Opposite Sex: $40. Dinner with Family Members: $50. People That Will Stand By You No Matter What: Priceless. Enough said.

Merry Christmas to all my friends, family, and readers.

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2004: The year in review OF HELL.

While it is premature to be writing end-of-the-year reviews, I'm jumping the gun. It's official. This year has absolutely fucking sucked.

January. I get demoted from my position at work to a much lower paying position. No one bothers to ask me why my job performance might not be 100%.

February. It's the same month as Valentine's Day and I'm still single.

March. The people at work decide to slash my hours in half. Never mind the fact that I give them my best month in terms of work performance, beating out everyone in my department and two people in a department that typically outperforms my department in terms of sales targets.

April. First, my father dies after a long chronic illness. Then the people at work decide to slash my hours back even further, to the point that it's not really worth my effort to continue working for them. I threaten to complain to Labour Relations and we "amicably" agree on a lay-off instead. Fuckers.

May. I manage to land two jobs, but I'm still collecting EI benefits as I'm working too sporadically, being that I don't work 5 days a week every week.

June. The place I'm about to move into is still incomplete. I end up living in a hotel for about a month while we wait for the slowpokes in construction to complete a job that they said would be done last year.

July. We've already moved in, but there's tons of work that needs to be done. The guys doing installation and painting are idiots. One guy left little exacto-knife shards on the carpet. It's a good thing I pick them up first.

August. The idiots who are responsible for painting use a spray gun to paint the exterior. As the garage isn't complete yet, my car is parked outside. It would have taken them ten seconds for them to tell me to move my car. Guess what happens.

Like an idiot, I allow them to clean my car. They use a harsh chemical to remove the paint and end up making a bigger mess and puting huge swirly scratches in the paint.

September. My student loan application is denied.

October. Almost died at work by falling off a ladder.

November. Mom's place is busted into and my entire DVD collection is jacked. Insurance covers less than 70% of it. Sadly, it's one of the things that insurance don't brokers bother to tell you about until AFTER your stuff gets stolen.

December 15th, 2004 (last night). My car is broken into and my stereo is stolen. Even though I have an alarm system, they disconnect the battery terminal, disabling it.

A member of the opposite sex who I ended up hanging out with last night (as well as expressed a personal interest in) indicated to me that I don't smile that much. I do like to joke around, tell jokes, and do whatever I can to make other people laugh, or at least smile. If there was a time in my life where I was doing the laughing and smiling, it probably didn't happen this year.

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“It’s about the stuff you can’t have, right?”
-Lenny Nero, from the film Strange Days (1995)

The ITP Nelson Canadian Dictionary of the English Language defines pornography as “sexually explicit material that sometimes equates sex with power and violence” or “the presentation or production of material.” The word itself is derived from the Greek word pronographos, or the writing about prostitutes (it seems that people have found a way to pervert new forms of media for more prurient interests even back then).

While it is a fairly common definition, it is fairly broad, not including things that have become regarded typically as pornography. As well, it applies the definition to other works which most people would not regard as pornography. For example, the advice and writings of Dr. Ruth Westheimer are fairly sexually explicit, yet more for educational purposes, yet are considered “pornography” according to this definition.

And then we have word being applied to non-sexually explicit material, and I’m not just talking about that scene in There’s Something About Mary where the protagonist uses a lingerie newspaper ad for visual stimulation (“What’s that hanging off your ear? Is that hair gel?”).

In the article “Ecoporn Exposed” (published in The Utne Reader, Sept/Oct ’04 issue), Lydia Millet compares the beautiful images of nature (often consisting of cute cuddly grizzly cubs, spotted dolphins, and mother-and-baby koala bears) to those found in Hustler magazine (sorry, no example here). Oddly-mixed metaphors aside, the article is more about the ineffectiveness of idealized images of nature for promoting environmental preservation. However, the author raises a few interesting points on how the features of pornography can be applied elsewhere.

“Both are clearly porn,” Millet writes, “They offer comfort to the viewer: They will always be there, ideal, unblemished, available. They offer gratification without social cost; they satiate by providing objects for fantasy without making uncomfortable demands on the subject.”

While most people (including myself) will not completely agree with the last two parts (especially when you consider the HIV outbreak and subsequent shutdown in the adult film industry earlier this year), pornographic material certainly does all and is all of those things: comforting, available, ideal, unblemished. One comparison that she Millet misses is that it shows the unattainable. Let’s face it…most women do not have bra sizes in the DD range (at least not naturally) while most men do not have monster-sized genitalia that extend past their knees (“Huh-huh…he said extend”). And chances are that pizza delivery boy (“Large pizza with extra sausage”) and pool cleaner boy (“Ma’am, I cleaned out your pipes…”) are not necessarily job titles that will allow you to have sex more often.

Idealizing just about anything has turned into a fetish and become the mainstream, just as much as the adult industry has enjoyed some explosive growth (pun mildly intended) in recent years. Because of this, it is fairly easy to draw comparisons between pornography and other mass market media, regardless of whether or not sex is involved.

“Food porn” (or “gastroporn”) has been the phrase that has been used to describe beautifully crafted imagery of dishes that most normal people couldn’t hope to do. Food Network cooking shows do this a lot. Showcasing the work of talented chefs with years of experience, they effortlessly take ingredients and combine them into a work of art. Chefs like these have years upon years of experience and expertise. Attempt to cook like that and most of us will have something charred and blackened. It probably wouldn’t taste good either.

“Domestic porn” is the term given to home improvement shows and magazines like Martha Stewart Living, where the domestic divas of the world show us what we'd have a really tough time doing unless we had that type of background or spare time. They show us techniques that would have most people causing significant damage to their homes as they see the absolute ease in which things are done, which are very costly to repair when they realize that it's a lot harder than it looks.

And then there's the late art icon Bob Ross. It's almost smugness, the likes of him shoving it in your face that he's better than you are (although chances are that he was a really nice guy in real life), when he takes a palette knife and a few shades of green and creates a beautiful landscape in a matter of minutes, even though talent typically takes years to develop. I had a few interesting comments about his show on a friend's blog when the topic came up.

What these have in common with pornography is they all show us the best case scenario while reminding us of what we don't have and what we aren't doing. What I'd like to see are practical cooking shows and home improvement shows for the rest of us. I wanna see stuff that is a little on the overdone or underdone side because we didn't read the instructions properly. I wanna see the sour reactions of guests as TV chefs present dishes that literally taste like dirt. I wanna see home improvement guys breaking windows and inadvertently firing nail guns through their toes as they attempt to put up floor board.

But on the other hand, the conniseiurs of pornography probably would stop watching if all the scenes were over and done with after the thirty second mark and all the porn stars had stretch marks, pot bellies, and hairy backs.

I actually stopped watching pornography because it was reminding me of what I wasn't doing with members of the opposite sex on a regular basis. What's interesting, though, is that when cooking and home improvement are turned into educational shows, it becomes pornographic. However, when images of explicit sexuality has any form of instruction in it, it ceases to be pornographic.

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"I'm like a chainsaw / I'll skin your ass raw / And if my day keeps going like this way I just might / break something tonight
I'm like a chainsaw (chainsaw) / I'll skin your ass raw (ass raw) / And if my day keeps going this way I just might / break your f***ing face tonight
Give me something to break (3x)
And that's your f**ing face
So come and get it."
-Limp Bizkit, "Break Stuff" from the album "Significant Other"

As described in my last entry, I've had a lot of really negative and violent energy that I had to get rid of. There's nothing like the feeling of personal violation to get the blood boiling. When left unfocused and unchecked, it can lead to disaster. When focused in a positive way, you can do a lot of great things.

When you have a lot of your personal belongings jacked all in one go, it's supposedly normal to feel like going out and finding the people responsible and doing God-Knows-Whatever to them. (un)Fortunately, "eye for an eye" isn't exactly appreciated by the Canadian justice system, even though it may lead to some temporary satisfaction. At least right before they toss you in prison, where you run the risk of becoming bitch to a big burly inmate named Bubba.

Wednesday's classes were a complete write off as I could barely concentrate enough to copy down the notes verbatim from the overhead projector, let alone digest and interpret what the instructor was saying. Running on pure adrenaline for the day, I've had one or two people advising me to stay home for the day. That might have been a good idea, although I already paid for my time, so there's no legitimate reason for me to skip out.

When I got home, after calling up pawnshops to see if they had a large number of stolen DVDs come in since Tuesday, I started working on my Communications 1118 assignment. The assignment was to create a set of instructions for a specific reading audience. Some chose topics ranging from the simplistic (programming a VCR) to the practical (ergonomics and stretching exercises) to the complex (injecting medication via hypodermic needle). Mine was a Women's Self-Defense Guide.

Being that I had a lot of negative and violent energy to work out, all of it was poured onto the page. That was possibly the most productive I've ever been able to be whenever tackling homework assignments. About 3 hours later, I managed to bang out 6 pages (single spaced with lots of white space).

Then I got people to read it. Negative energy, properly channeled, can be of good use, but only when it's focused. Sure, I managed to get the assigment done in record time, but here's some of the feedback I received:

-"I didn't like the stomping part. (at the beginning.)"
-"You might want to edit out the thing about stomping on the person's face repeatedly."
-"You mentioned stomping on the person's face in both the introduction and the disclaimer. You might wanna change that."
-"This thing about stomping on a person's face? I'm not sure if you're trying to be funny, but it's not really appropriate for the tone."
-"Perhaps refrain from overusing phrase --> 'Stomping on his face'"

All of a sudden, I'm starting to realize why Women's Self-Defense classes are almost always taught by women and male involvement typically ends at being the would-be assailant that wears armor made of really thick padding (especially around the crotch, throat, and head areas). Thank goodness for rewrites.

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There are some that are eagerly awaiting my next blog entry, but it's kinda on the backburner right now. Can't go into too much detail, but let's just say I got a really big problem with individuals that can't respect the property of others and see fit to violate that. Try as they might, the cops can't do anything to curb the problem and pawnshops are actually helping the problem proliferate.

Sure, insurance will cover most losses, but it won't cover the feeling of violation and the lost productivity. As it was, I couldn't even study last night as all I wanted to do was hunt down those two or more bastards responsible and lay the smack down on them.

As Vincent Vega said in Pulp Fiction: "Boy, I wish I could've caught him doing it. I'd have given anything to catch that asshole doing it. It'd been worth him doing it just so I could've caught him doing it. "

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Wok With Yim, part 2

Chicken fajitas (serving 3).

1 lb of chicken breasts, cut into strips.
small red onion, diced
two medium tomatoes, diced
small can of pitted black olives
1/4 head of Romaine lettuce, shredded
2 cups of cheddar cheese, grated
1 package of soft tortillia shells (flour or corn)

Seasonings: chilli powder (about 1/2-1 tsp), tobasco sauce, louisiana hot sauce, worchestershire, fresh cracked pepper, all to taste.

Optional toppings: pickled jalapenos, sour cream, salsa.

I love these types of do-it-yourself recipes where the diner gets to choose what they stuff in their own tortilla shell. They go based on what they like the most or least and they can't complain if someone put too much of whatever in it because they're the ones that they are the ones that assembled it.

This is a really easy recipe as the only thing you're really doing is slicing up vegetables and seasoning then cooking meat. Even that part isn't that hard -- slice chicken into strips, season. Fry onions until slightly brown/translucent, then add meat (being that it's chicken, you don't wanna mess around and serve it slightly raw). Warm up flour or corn tortillias by layering them with moist paper towels and then microwave on high for 30-40 seconds.

Assembly is left up to the diner. I like to go tortillia --> chicken --> cheese --> lettuce --> tomato --> olive --> jalapeno --> salsa --> sour cream --> FOLD.

This was also my first time experimenting with corn tortillias, which I had to get as my sister just discovered that she's allergic to wheat and gluten. I don't actually like soft corn tortillias because they have a bit of a gritty texture to them. Taste, I don't mind so much. But, we still did have a package of flour tortillias.

Lots of variations on this one. You can substitute beef for chicken if you wish.

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"Junk...FUCK!

Good night, best in a long time / A new friend turned me onto an old favourite /
Nothing better than a dealer who's high / Be high, convince them to buy

What's my drug of choice? / Well what have you got? /
I don't go broke / and I do it a lot."

-"Junkhead" by Alice in Chains, from the album Dirt (1992)

In a previous blog, I mentioned how this month is both video gamer heaven and productivity hell, due to the number of high-profile video games (read: the ones that I really want to play) that are hitting the shelves. Video games and I have a nasty history together, with Doom 2 (or more appropriately, my inability to stop playing it) being one of the reasons why I ended up not getting initial acceptance into UBC upon graduating high school, or that one time when I managed to piss away an entire day playing nothing but Diablo 2.

Video game addiction has become a bit of a hot button topic for educators, parents, psychologists, and more recently, advertisers as well. We joke about it all the time, but there is still a significant amount of controversy surrounding it. Sure, video games can promote problem solving skills, increased hand-eye-coordination, and faster reflexes. But then, they can also suck away hours that could be spent doing more productive or beneficial tasks.

Plus, they are a significant hinderance on a person's social life, even if a person the type isn't already the bookish unsociable type. Everquest, one particularly addictive on-line game, has spawned a whole bunch of "Everquest Widow" support groups, consisting of girlfriends and wives that are being neglected by their Everquest addicted significant others (the game has also been called "EverCrack" by its detractors).

It seems that video game companies are completely aware of the anti-social and addictive properties of their games, as their recent ad campaigns are starting to reflect. A recent ad for EA Sports depicts a young man and a young woman are on a date and like a true gentleman, he holds open a taxi door for her. As she enters, he closes the door and slaps the hood of the taxi, signalling for to leave. We see that he's looking at a bus shelter ad for the new NHL 2005 game.

Another recent ad shows a distraught teenage girl admitting she bought something for her boyfriend that's caused him to withdraw from friends and family. The commercial is shot to resemble an anti-drug commercial, but we soon realize that she's actually talking about the latest Metroid game for Nintendo.

Sure, I regret the all-day benders I've had on Diablo 2 and Doom, the endless hours I've spent on Need for Speed Underground when I clearly should've been studying, or the days whittled away on Tetris. You know you're in really deep trouble when you close your eyes and you can still see those damn blocks falling down.

I've slowly taken steps to curb this. Having recently purchased Half-Life 2, I made a point of doing up a to-do list of things that really need to be done first, and then taping it to the box that the discs come in. As it stands, the to-do list taunts me from the bookshelf.

On the list:
-Finish two major papers
-Study for grammar quiz
-Clean house before mom comes back from vacation
-Dust shelves
-Do dishes

I probably wouldn't have to do this if I purchased Dance Dance Revolution Ultramix 2 (which comes out on the 20th, as far as I know). While the game is "addictive," most people can't actually play it for more than thirty minutes straight, because it's so physically intensive. Play a more passively physical game like Half-Life 2 and before you know it, the entire week will have passed.

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Wok with Yim

As Mom is off in Hong Kong, I've been forced to channel my inner Stephen Yan, Julia Child, and annoying New York-based TV chef that says "BAM" a lot. Not that I mind, as I actually enjoy cooking (I also have a container full of Banana Chocolate Chip muffins that I made before the weekend). I'm repeatedly told that the ladies love a man who can cook. I have yet to take advantage of this.

Anywho, my latest venture:

3-Bean Atomic Chili (okay, not really my "latest" venture, as I do make it a lot, but considering that the ingredients are different every time...)

Ingredients:
-3 lbs of lean ground beef
-4 cups of dried beans (kidney, pinto, black-eye)
-2 cans of diced tomatoes (cheaper than the fresh ones)
-2 carrots (for some odd reason, a 5 pound bag is cheaper than a 3 pound bag...I asked the produce clerk why and he couldn't tell me)
-2 stalks of celery
-1 green pepper
-1 cup of frozen corn (again, cheaper than fresh)
-1 small red onion
-1/4 lb mushrooms

seasoning:
-Soy sauce, black pepper, Dave's Insanity sauce, crushed chillies, chili powder, tobasco sauce, louisiana hot sauce, and paint thinner (just kidding on that last part).

preparation:
-soak all beans in water overnight
-season meat with whatever you can find (because I do this without any planning, it tastes different every time I make it)
-slice all vegetables
-fry onions with about 1tsp of vegetable oil until transparent, add meat, cook until brown. Remove from heat and place aside.
-Throw everything else into the pot. Add water until everything is juuuuuust covered, bring to boil.
-Add meat, stir, boil for a few more minutes, and set stove to low heat. Simmer, stirring occasionally.
-Add seasonings to taste.
-Allow to thicken and serve. Simmer time will vary, but should be allowed to simmer for several hours at least.

Unfortunately, I didn't really keep concious tabs as to how much Louisiana and Dave's Insanity Sauce I was adding (I gave it a few good shakes), so now the chilli doesn't have any flavour, but it's hot enough to burn through stomach lining. Yesterday's Satay-stir fry chicken and vegetables was much better.

But on the plus side, it means that I won't have to cook for the next week or two.

And remember. If Yim can cook, so can you.

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In response to yesterday's blog, Debbie notes and asks:

"just out of curiousity, what is your opinion on Catholicism as a moral code that is commonly perceived as 'one that dictates that we act ethically for promise of reward or fear of punishment'?

i'm not trying to insinuate anything; just want to know what you think."

Unfortunately, this is a really huge topic for me that can't be explained in a few sentences, as it's something that I don't fully understand myself. That, and every time the topic of religion is brought up, it opens up a huge can of worms in a lot of people. In most cases, it's simply best to agree to disagree.

But, I actually adapted the idea from an Einstein quote:

"A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties and needs; no religious basis is necessary. Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to berestrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death."

This actually makes complete sense to me, especially since my own views of religion have changed significantly over the years. I mean, I was born and raised Catholic, was an altar boy, and even went to Catholic school (hence, the whole thing about girls in Catholic school uniforms holds no sway for me...but I digress).

However, I'm not practicing Catholic anymore because the church and I disagree on a lot of controversial issues, like same-sex marriages, stem cell research, and birth control. And if that wasn't good enough, you have the Pope, the world's moral religious authority, telling the people of impoverished third world nations not to use condoms as they are ineffective in preventing the spread of AIDS/HIV.

As for the Catholic system of punishment and reward, I would agree that it is certainly a powerful motivator for some people. But for people that don't believe in the notion of heaven and hell, what is there to motivate moral and ethical behaviour? Upbringing would have to do with it, and chances are that a punishment and reward system was incorporated. Draw crayons on the wall? No TV for a week. Get an A on your report card? You get to go see a movie.

But it's not always effective. We have individuals that are supposedly driven by God, but end up doing some really horrible things. We have children being abused in residential schools by Catholic priests, abortion doctors being shot by snipers, holy wars, crusades, and inquisitions. And then you got the televangelists. Don't get me started on televangelists.

I guess what I'm saying is that subscribing to a religious moral code does not necessarily make you better or more ethical than the next person. The percentage of priests that molest children is probably proportional to the number of child molesters among the regular non-denominational population.

As for myself? Despite my beliefs, there's a good possibility that any moral and ethical behaviour I partake in will have no immediate or long-term benefits. I am well aware of this. But, while I'm around, I might as well make the best out of it. Why do I do it? I dunno. I guess it's just the way I was brough up.

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Do you believe in Karma?

I haven't quite made up my mind yet. I prefer to live by my own moral code, rather than one that dictates that we act ethically for promise of reward or fear of punishment. But then, there are things around me that make me think.

-An acquaintance relayed a story where his older brother helped a blind man cross the street. "I'm going to have such a good day!" he says, implying that some good will come of his actions. He ends up losing his wallet, containing about $300 in cash.

-Rachel Davis, 23, attempts to intervene when a man is being beaten up outside of a nightclub. She is shot and killed. The shooter happens to be the man she is attempting to aid.

-Sohan Gill, 77, is involved in a hit and run incident. It is estimated that fifteen vehicles pass him by before anyone helps him.

I agree, this world is a really crappy place. However, I see it as a serious sickness of society when people are unwilling to intervene when things happen around them. People don't want to get involved because it's not their business. Or, people don't want to get involved because they don't want to get blamed.

You break a person's ribs while performing CPR, you can get sued. You don't perform CPR because you think you'll break the person's ribs, you'll be charged under some sort of Good Samaritan law.

Me? I returned a wallet to someone on Monday night, having picked it up at the Scott Road Skytrain station. I went to the wrong house first (the address was partially rubbed off the driver's license, so I misread the "8" as a "3"), but eventually found it (I took a detour for nothing, when it was actually 5km from where I live). I arrive at the residence and the wallet owner isn't home, but her brother is. I hand it off and go along my way.

So, does the good deed go unpunished? Does the nice guy finish last? Let's see.

-Tuesday, 16:00: A class that no one really feels like attending is spontaneously cancelled. Good thing.
-16:02. There is a malfunction on the Skytrain, which means the trip takes longer. Bad thing.
-16:03. The second I get on the Skytrain, it actually starts moving. Good thing.
-16:04. I'm forced to disembark at Scott Road Station, wait about ten minutes for another Skytrain to arrive. Bad thing.

Eh, Karma's a sham. It's all about perception.

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Crunch time at school is supposedly over, as the much trumped-up "Week 9" where all our assignments were all due at once has since been finished. Honestly, I was expecting a lot more, as I only pulled one all-nighter. And that was two weeks before. That was also the same week I discovered the joys of Red Bull ®. Nothing like the feeling of rapid heart beat, twitching fingers, and dodgy eye movement, and then trying to sleep afterwards and getting only about five minutes of intermittent sleep.

However, there still has much work to be completed. As I write this, a rhetorical studies essay (Communications 1118) still needs to be written and the related materials still have to be reviewed, so an outline can be formulated. The desire to slack off is strong in this one.

This is going to get worse, as all of the sequels to the big video games come out this month. Halo 2 (probably gonna give this a miss because I prefer to play First Person Shooters on PC), Dance Dance Revolution Ultramix 2, Need for Speed Underground 2, and Half-Life 2 all come out within the next few weeks. During the crunch weeks, I've been pretty good about avoiding video games and television (before the weekend, I managed to avoid watching television for about two weeks), but I'm starting to realize what is giving video games their strong appeal: instant gratification.

For the most part, I could probably hold off until December, when I can really, really slack off. But it does lead to the questions as to why video games hold such a strong hold. Sure, November is gaming heaven for some people. But it's also gaming hell for people who are trying to get work done.

Sadly, it's really tough to find anything that can translate in a work and school environment into an instant gratification award. That is, unless your work just happens to involve the sale of illegal mind-altering substances.

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There's never a damn phone booth when you need one!

I finally got my friend to send me photos from Halloween party I attended last Saturday. I seriously lack imagination when it comes to Halloween costumes, usually choosing to dig through the closet. This was probably the first Halloween I dressed up as something different, as I have the tendency to recycle costumes throughout the years.

The clothing for these could easily be worn on an average day with no one really paying any mind if it was worn in any other combination

1994, 1995, 1996: Eric Draven from The Crow (black turtleneck, black pants, black wig, makeup. In 1996, I didn't have to wear a wig)

1997, 1998: N/A. Didn't do anything, no need to dress up

1999, 2000, 2003: Agent Smith from The Matrix / Agent from Men in Black / any Chow Yun-Fat character from a John Woo gangster movie / Mr. Orange from Reservoir Dogs (black suit and tie that has been in my closet forever, plus whatever accessories)

2001, 2002: Waldo from the Where is Waldo book series (red-and-white striped shirt that I found in my closet one day, plus a red-and-white toque, and a walking stick that I covered in red and white material).

I guess that means I'll be dressing up like Clark Kent next year (Superman logo t-shirt with shirt and tie over it, plus Daily Planet press pass).

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"Jump higher!"
"Tuck your knees in faster!"
"Land on the balls of your feet, not your heels!"
"Don't jump back, jump straight up!"
"C'mon, you only got three more!"

Following Monday's Capoeira class, I found myself breaking out the crash mat and practicing backflips. Having resolved to do at least ten of them after every class, it is something I wish to improve at. The mechanics are quite simple, although difficult to execute if it's something that you have never done before. It's even harder if you are afraid that you are going to land on your head.

But, the mechanics are as follows:

1: Jump really high, making sure that you're jumping straight up while raising your arms.
2: Tuck your knees towards your chest. The motion of doing so causes your body to rotate.
3: Land.

This all happens really fast, so it's not particularly easy to break down into steps. A more simple definition? Just do it.

As I am doing so, I am beckoned from across the room. All the students who were taking the previous class are shouting from across the room. "I've got some advice for you too," one of my fellow students announces. After finishing my practice session, I walk over to her and ask. "Oh, I actually can't do those," she admits, "Everyone else was shouting out advice."

If you've noticed, people are the most prone to give out advice and their own opinions when they are most likely the least qualified. What is even worse is that people are prone to solicit advice and opinions from those that are unqualified as well. If you've ever been in a room with a bunch of people and something goes wrong with the computer, you can be assured that everyone is going to be calling out the things one would usually do. "Run a virus scan!" "Hit CTRL-ALT-DELETE!" "De-frag the hard drive!" "Update the video drivers!"

One could probably dedicate a whole scholarly study to this phenomeon. We see it in our lives all the time. People who can't sort out their own personal lives will be solicited for advice (I know I am), celebrities are consulted for their "expertise" on political matters (are any of them trained?), and if something goes wrong with the VCR at a party, at least one person will be telling the host to adjust the tracking, even if it's clearly a problem with the connections.

Me, I just like helping people. However, I really wonder what kind of "help" I'm providing at times.

And as for my Capoeira class? We all cheer each other on, so it's not such a big deal when we start giving unqualified advice. We all like pushing each other harder so we all can progress. Like I keep saying, in my group, when you pull off the impossible moves, everybody cheers. When you screw them up really badly, everybody cheers LOUDER.

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"There were 73 of us livin' in a cardboard box / All I got for Christmas was a lousy bag of rocks / every night for dinner, we had a big ole chunk o' dirt / if we were really good, we didn't get desert." -Weird Al Yankovick, "When I Was Your Age"

The conversation went like this.

Me: Now time to go home and do some homework.
Her: So, you're like, in grade...twelve?
Me: Uh...I'm in college right now. I'm 27.

This may have to do with the fact that I was wearing my baseball hat backwards, but at any rate, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be insulted or flattered. In addition, this throws my whole rule of thumb when determining the age of an Asian person completely out of whack (take the age that you think they are, then add about three or four).

Sure, being a lot younger looking has its benefits. For one, I won't look completely out of place in places where young people tend to congregate (as if I did any congregating when I was younger anyway), and if I was an actor, this would be a godsend (I can still play teenagers!). But on the other hand, people aren't taken as seriously if they look much younger, and if I forget my ID and I want to buy beer, I'm going home empty handed.

All of a sudden, I'm recalling a conversation with one of my classmates:

"You're 27? Wow! I thought you were one of us!"
"Excuse me?"
"Y'know, one of us young people."

They say age is only a state of mind, but that one made me feel really, really old.

For people who wanna know my secret, there is none, really. Apart from staying young by hitting the gym, eating properly, and not smoking, drinking, or excessively partying, there isn't much to it. But, like the joke goes...

Patient: I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't party, I don't fool around. So, I'm asking you, doctor. How long am I going to live?

Doctor: Live? What for?

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go hit the gym and make myself a protein shake when I'm done.

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To borrow from a blog from an acquaintance, it's only appropriate that this particular blog is entitled...

Food for Thought

Today, I celebrated a friend's birthday (happy 28th, Karen!). As it was intended as a potluck, I was requested to bring a food dish. Being that I was coming after school, I didn't exactly have time to prepare food, so I decided to take the easy way out and grab a dish of chow mein or something. Thinking I would just phone up the restaurant, get them to prepare the dish, and I would pick it up on the way.

So, with the wonderful tool that is the Internet, I punch up the local search engine. "Ho Do" and "Surrey" were the search terms. Among the listings for local area businesses and the place in the on-line phone book, it spat this out:

"FOOD ESTABLISHMENT CLOSURES, PREVIOUS 12 MONTHS" (as of May 31, 2004).

I scroll down and find an entry for "Ho Do."

Perishable foods not being stored under proper temperatures. Raw meats stored above ready to eat food products. Kitchen sanitation was poor, and requires thorough cleaning of all equipment, shelves, walls and floor. Dishwasher not reaching sanitizing temperatures.

Worse yet, there is another infraction from them, dated barely a month and a half later.

Failure to obtain food from an approved source (!), failure to protect food from contamination, failure to ensure proper condition of equipment, utensils and food contact surfaces, failure to maintain premises, equipment and utensils in a sanitary condition.

While not quite as bad as some of the other entries (mentions of "rodent infestations", "cockroaches"), it draws enough concern for me to contact an acquaintance to recommend another restaurant within the area. Mind you, I've pretty much eaten at all of the Chinese restaurants in the area, but it never hurts to have a second opinion (although the fact that my sister ate there and almost cut the inside of her mouth on a STAPLE that was buried in a plate of beef noodles should've been a more obvious indicator).

I am recommended to go to Lee Yuen, another local Chinese seafood restaurant. Firing up the handy-dandy search engine, it spits out the same page. Realizing that I've already seen the page, I scroll down a little further.

Failure to ensure proper construction, condition or use of equipment, utensils and food contact surfaces. Failure to maintain premise, equipment and utensils in sanitary conditions. Sale of contaminated food.

And to think, I used to like eating there. While most restaurants get shut down for a day at most, a closer look reveals that Lee Yuen was shut down for the better part of two weeks. Will I go eat at this restaurant? Or at ANY restaurant for that matter?

Sure, most restaurants are safe to eat at. However, my mom used to work as a payroll clerk in a Chinese restaurant. From what she tells me, if one were to go into the kitchen of a Chinese restaurant, you'd never eat there again.

Eh, I needed to expand the number of dishes I can cook anyway. I'm sick of cooking nothing but stir-fried vegetables and meat.

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I'm starting to wonder if I'm slightly masochistic, given my penchance towards biting off more than I can chew. But, one thing that proves to be an effective strategy in such a case is to spit out the said mouthful, cut it into smaller chunks, then try again. Not that I recommend doing this at the dinner table, mind you, because that's just frickin' gross and no one really wants to see that.

As I write this, I have a rhetorical analysis draft due tomorrow (only of which half of the criteria of the assignment can be met, but thankfully, it is only a draft), a 600-700 word memoir due on Tuesday (I already have the first draft done), an electronic resume for Thursday (this will take all of five minutes), and the final draft of the rhetorical analysis on Friday. I also have to begin transcriptions for all of my interviews. This includes the ones conducted for Fangoria magazine, but also the one done for my writer profile/interview assignment. Oy.

Next week, I don't even wanna think about. But, I do know I have another three or four assignments due that same week. Everyone says that crunch time is in November, but I'm feeling something crumbling right now.

Crumbling...mmm...rasberry crumble...

But on the plus side, I managed do deal with a very accommodating film cast and crew yesterday and the day before, aced my grammar quiz on Wednesday, and was able to complete a backflip in Capoeira today without landing on my head or hurting my feet.

So, what is there to do now that I have a mouthful of crap in my mouth? I can either swallow it and choke, or I can spit it out and cut it up into itty-bitty chunks, and hope no one notices I just spat something back onto the plate.

I'm choosing the spit method. Who cares what other people think.

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School / work

I have about two or five major assignments due over the course of the next two weeks. Evidently, I didn't think I was busy enough because I decided to take another writing assignment for Fangoria magazine. This time, I'm covering Sam's Lake, a horror film that is being shot out of Nanaimo. I get to take a ferry for this one.

One of my homework assignments was to meet and interview a professional writer, and then to do a complete profile. I chose Andy Linardatos, an award winning copy writer and creative director for Rethink Communications, a local advertising company. I managed to get tons of great information and I know I'll get a pretty good mark on the assignment.

I was pretty surprised that I managed to get a prominent local writer, although I was also impressed that some of the other people in my class managed to get some very high-profile writers as well, including Vancouver Sun sports writer Ian McIntyre, RCMP media liason Tim Shields, and local political pundit Rachel Mardsen.

Yeah, I know. I was pretty floored too. I mean, Ian McIntyre. I love that guy's column!

Pop Culture Vulture

Last Saturday, I caught a preview screening of Team America: World Police. As it's brought to you by the same guys that created South Park, it's going to have lots of swearing and violence, and somewhere buried underneath is a strong political message. But it's still pretty funny to boot...they don't spare anybody in it. They make fun of everyone from Michael Moore to Alec Baldwin (who allegedly offered his voice talents to the filmmaker).

One thing I can say for sure...it has one particularly memorable scene that makes the vomit scene in Monty Python's Meaning of Life look like a hiccup.

Person that Writes Things

My on-set report for Fangoria on Alone in the Dark is still indefinitely on-hold pending release of the film, although my other set report of Thralls is due for publication early 2005 to coincide with the film's video debut.

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Canadian Thanksgiving doesn't seem to be so much as a big deal for Canadians as it is for Americans. For one, it wasn't made a national holiday until 1957. But, it is also tied in much less with Canadian history than with American history. While most folks know that American Thanksgiving is celebrated to commemorate the settling of the pilgrims in Massachusetts and the shared meal between the native people (we have countless Thanksgiving TV specials to thank for that), most Canadians aren't aware of the history behind it.

There isn't one particular concrete historical event that is accepted to be the main reason for Canadian Thanksgiving, but here's a quick sampling:

-It was originally a European tradition to celebrate the fall harvest, which was brought over to Canada when European settlers arrived.
-In 1578, English traveller Martin Frobisher attempted to find a northern passage to the Orient, but instead settled in Canada. The "first" Thanksgiving was held to celebrate his good fortune.
-Was held in April 15th, 1872 after the then-future King Edward VII recovered from a serious illness.

Whatever the history, there are still reasons to be thankful. What am I thankful for?

-A supportive family that I know I can turn to when I need them. This family has gotten a little bit smaller this year, but it is still my family nonetheless.

-Good friends. As much as people constantly come in and out of my life, I'm grateful that I have people that I can talk to, hang out with, and just be myself without worrying about being judged.

-My health. Mind you, I'll always have to work at this one (proper diet and exercise), but I'm grateful that I'm not chronically ill like my late father or struggling with addiction issues like many other people. I'm also grateful that I didn't fall off that ladder last weekend, or else I'd be composing this from a hospital bed. But, like I later brought up in one of my classes that week, "The best thing about almost dying at work is that you get to go home early."

-Heroes. We always need more of them, not ones that are pre-fabricated by the media. I mean people like Christopher Reeve, an actor that fought for spinal cord research, who passed away yesterday, as opposed to heroes that pre-fabricated by the media.

-The stuff I have. Thankfully, I'm not particularly materialistic, which was important this year because I ended up bouncing around from job to job before going back to school. This is important as I'm not able to fill my life with as much crap as I used to (eg: clothes, eating out, stuff that I generally don't need).

-The Internet. Where would I be without it?

Happy Canadian Thanksgiving to all my readers.

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"And remember, bring back something illegal!"

This is something I have been known to say whenever I know someone is travelling to a foreign country. As local customs vary from place to place, so does the idea of contraband. This is partly due to traditions held by each culture and ignorance held by others.

My mom is going to Hong Kong next month to visit relatives for about a week. Like the last time she went, I'm asking her to bring over a pair of authentic nunchaku. I'm not talking about those foam padded Nerf ® ones that you coudln't so much as kill a fly with. I'm talkin' those ones that are hard-wood, joined with a swivel chain, and could really be used to put a dent in a person's skull. And they require significant skill and practice to use effectively.

For some odd reason, Canadian customs has seen fit to confiscate melee weaponry such as this. As a martial artist that lacks carpetry skills, I don't know how to make my own from raw materials so I have been trying to find a way to get a pair of my own. But, given the hard line stance on exotic weaponry, it's not going to be easy.

This has always confused me, because martial arts weaponry requires an amount skill to use, as improper use will inevitably result in injury of the user (how many clips from America's Funniest Home Videos show a guy smacking himself in the groin with a pair of nunchuks?). It would be far easier to use any number of every day objects to seriously lay the smackdown on someone if you're so inclined. All you need is a little imagination.

-Fire extinguisher. You can pull one of these off the wall and put a dent in someone's head if you convert it into a makeshift bat.

-Ballpoint pen. Jammed into someone's nose, it can cause excruciating pain. Forced up even further, it can penetrate the sinus cavity and enter the victim's brain. It could also be used as a stabbing weapon, especially through sensitve areas such as a person's eyeball.

-Soda can. When torn in half, the aluminum is very sharp and could easily break skin.

As it is, nunchaku were supposedly intended for use by the people of feudal Japan to crush rice (the most prevalent theory) and to reign in horses (based on how the word is derived from the Okinawan words for horse, nun and briddle, chiyaku). Given the fact that all the bladed weapons were banned by the feudal lords, the martial artists turned to farming implements.

While there were regulations against the importing of such weapons prior to the 9/11 attacks, they are even more stringent now. The Canadian Air Transport Security Authority has a list detailing items that are restricted for carry-on luggage. While their list does not include martial arts weapons, it makes some particularly odd allowances and restrictions. Some of them make sense, such as a fire extinguisher. This is not due to its potential use as a weapon, but because of the pressurized gas contained inside. But others?

Sporting implements like hockey sticks are restricted. In a very tight environment, this would make for a highly impractical weapon, as would golf clubs and lacrosse sticks (which are also restricted). Yet they allow umbrellas (which are potential stabbing weapons) and wooden canes (which are potential bludgeoning weapons).

Oddly enough, they allow whips. I'm wondering if that's an error.

It never fails to amuse me, how any number of everyday objects could be used to much more deadly effect than martial arts weapons in the wrong hands, yet even an otherwise legitimate, law-abiding martial artist would be considered breaking the law by posessing them.

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Work:

Today ranks as the shortest working day on record. My job involved power washing somebody's house for painting purposes. As I climbed up the ladder, I realized that the ladder was improperly set. As a result, it was beginning to slip as I was standing at the second floor.

I was forced to grab the ladder and the roof at the same time, dropping the sprayer. It hit the pavement below. As I went back down to move the ladder and pick up the sprayer. An important piece was broken off, rendering it useless (however, it is repairable).

Total elapsed time: One hour, forty-five minutes. I'll have to go back tomorrow pending the repair and availability of equipment.

School:

The temptation to slack and veg is very strong. My X-Box beckons from the corner while still shrinkwrapped DVDs scream out to be opened, liberated, and viewed. Not surprisingly, they scream to me louder than my school books. I try to justify it, saying that the DVD I'm about to watch ("Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind", FYI) needs to be viewed so I can write a "Script-to-Film Comparison" article for Screenwritersvoice.com, but when it all boils down, it's two hours that should be spent studying and doing homework (even more when you consider how long it takes the write the article).

"Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy but socially dead."

However, I do have the first draft of one assignment due. I'm supposed to write a 400-word essay on the process of choosing a dictionary. As we're writing for a specific intended audience (aspiring writers), I decided to write it in a very sarcastic manner, outlining the alternative uses of a dictionary. As many writers live in squallor, are broke, and can't afford proper furniture, one could use a dictionary for kindling, killing rats and cockroaches, and propping up the short leg of a couch.

Love Life:

(CLEARS THROAT LOUDLY)

NEXT!

Person that Writes Things / Pop Culture Vulture:

My film review of Shark Tale is now on-line at Screenwriter's Voice. If you don't really feel like reading the whole thing, let's just say that the story and characters jump the shark really early in the film (pun intended).

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